Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Homestay Gifts

Instead of actually writing this up, I'm just copy-pasting from my explanation of what just happened to my homeboy Josh Lo. It may be a facebook chat, but I find it has its own kind of appealing poetic style.

Short preface => my fb status well summarizes the sitch: "host family gifts: chocolate for kids who aren't allowed sweets, liquor to a man who doesn't drink, and gold earrings to a woman without pierced ears. FML."

Josh: are those gift stories all true?

Dara: ...yes

instead of being american about it
and just saying thanks so much
the dad opened the gift
and quietly announces "oh. i don't drink"
sees my face fall
and says "... thank you"

then gift #2
mom opens the box
sort of grimaces
and says "i can't wear the pierce"
"...thank you"

gift #3
me: this is for the whole family, but especially for you two!
kids open box
it contains giant bag of hershey miniatures
the girl takes one
i take 2 mini mr. goodbars because I'm STARVING
at which point dad announces that no, thy won't have any right now
because they don't want to get fat


that's the reason?

so there i am, nuts and chocolate halfway in my face

oh no

feeling obese and awkward from the 2 minute silence that follows
before i head back to my room
and realize that what just happened
is probably the funniest thing in the history of the world
riiiight after midgets who can juggle

3 for 3

The end.

In related news, go read Josh's blog. He's much better about posting than I am.


Anonymous said...

haha! speaking of midgets - this is right up there with the time I looked out my summer rental window, and had the delightful view of a midget playing golf. With full size clubs.

NotYourMom said...

I laugh every time I read this post..

dara said...

I've lived every day of my life hoping to see midgets playing full-sized golf (actually, midget mini golf has its own spectacular set of merits), I just didn't know it! Thanks for focusing my ennui ;)